Wednesday, September 5, 2012

This writer is really insecure today!

Though I have been a really awful blog participant for the past few months, I am glad that this is the day for talking about being insecure. 

You see, if someone else who had published their first novel through a small press and seen it place as a finalist in some competition or other came to me and said "I can't find a publisher for my second book, it sure must suck," I would calmly:
  • Explain that the general state of rapid evolution happening in the fiction market right now is making it hard for even established writers to find publishers. 
  • Point out that publishers pick books on quality and marketability, and not being the ideal title to market does not mean that the book is not quality.
  • Remind this someone that some of the best books of our time were rejected dozens of times. 
So if I am aware of all of these things, but it took me a long time to reconcile what I know with what I believe.

I've recently made the decision to self-publish my second novel, Don't Wake Up. I have to admit that, at first, I was really depressed about this, as it seemed to be a step backward. I went from having a publisher to self-publishing, and had it ingrained in my head that it should go the other way.

And then something happened-- I started designing the book, selecting an editor, picking a cover. I had control of every decision. I had a lot of control working with a small press, but nothing like this.

I also started hopping all over to blogs of other self-published writers and found amazing, amazing talent. I knew there were great self-published writers, but the volume and tenor of the discussions I found encouraged and motivated me.

I've changed my mind-- I am no longer depressed. I am in control, and ecstatic to have a platform to share my book, and participate in such an amazing online community!


  1. That's so wonderful that you have found peace with it! That's the way it should be :)

  2. Best to you. It does feel good to move forward! Hope it does well and keep writing. I keep telling myself the same thing.

  3. That's awesome! A lot of my author friends have self-published and with great success. It's not a step back. If your book is great, it's an awesome step.

  4. The future is open!

  5. A great post, especially for other authors struggling with this same decision. Depression Cookies was originally accepted by a small press and (long story) we ended up self-publishing. I had the same initial feelings of disappointment, but now I can't imagine any other way.

    Can't wait to read this and see your vision fully!

  6. Congratulations on your decision. I have several author friends who faced and are facing this same decision. All of them struggle with it, but the ones that have gone that way haven't regretted it :)

  7. I'm thinking of starting with a novella, even though it's very different from the majority of my work.

    Good luck!